Is your to-do list stressing you out? Maybe you use a planner to organize your schedule every week, but you never get it all done. You feel like a failure. {Spoiler alert: You are not!} You can’t seem to get ahead for more than a day at most and falling behind just makes it all worse. Drop the guilt and learn the easiest way to get more done and prioritize when you’re overwhelmed during the holidays.
Confession: There is always more planned in my planner than I have time to do.
I don’t know why I do it, but every week I fill up my days. Sometimes I plan down to the hour. This can be helpful unless something takes 5 minutes longer than I planned. Then my whole day crumbles and my week follows.
I feel like a failure because I didn’t do everything I “had” to do this week. Except I didn’t really have to do it all, I just wanted to.
With the holiday season, Halloween to New Years, just about here, odds are that your schedule will be even more full than usual. And it will feel like you have even less time to get it all done.
If you’re looking forward to the holidays with a mix of joy and dread, know that you’re not alone.
This is the time of year when parents want to make everything magical for their kids. Not every day and every event can be Pinterest or Instagram perfect and that’s okay.
How to prioritize
The trick to feeling like you did enough is to do the most important things first.
There are weeks where my house looks like a tornado came through, my blog has not been updated, and we’ve eaten takeout that was not planned. On those weeks, I have to remind myself that there are only 3 things I have to do each week:
(1) Love and feed my family, (2) get everyone to school and jobs, and (3) pay the bills before they are late.
There are, of course, more things that are important. So how do you prioritize?
Keep a running list of what you want and need to do daily and weekly. For each item, decide if you need to…
Delay – Sometimes putting something off until later isn’t procrastination, it’s saving your sanity. Ex. Ready to start a new exercise routine? January is probably a better time than November. Feel the urge to declutter then pantry this weekend? Maybe it can wait until next week.
Delegate – I am the queen of “nobody can do it better than I can.” It might be true, but it isn’t practical. Decide which tasks can be given to someone else: your spouse, your children, your coworkers, etc. They aren’t going to do it the way you would, but some stuff just needs to be done. Ex. Your spouse can stop by Walmart on the way home instead of you going back out. Your 10-year-old can fold the towels and put them away, even if they will be crooked.
Delete – Sometimes it seems like everything is important. It’s not. It’s okay to say no to extra activities, especially if you’re only doing them out of guilt. Take a store-bought dessert to the party instead of making one from scratch. Purchase a gift instead of DiY-ing at midnight.
Do it – If you can’t delay, delegate, or delete, you probably just need to do it. This should be the most important things {like paying the electric bill} but also the fun stuff {like baking those cookies you’ve made for every family Christmas in the past decade}.
Note: I’ve given examples, but only you know what’s most important to you and your family.
If you’re overwhelmed during the holidays
Okay, so I’m going to issue a little challenge for you and me this year.
We’re going to have a less stressful holiday season by doing a few easy things:
- Keep a family calendar and make sure everyone is looking at it regularly.
Avoid the surprise of trying to be in 2 places at the same time. - Designate one day per week that has nothing planned.
Everybody needs downtime. - Choose your extra activities wisely. Ask yourself {and maybe your family} one question, “If we don’t do this, will we regret it in January?”
Ex. If you have a photo of your kids with Santa every year, find the best time to schedule that tradition. If you’ve been invited to 2 parties in 1 weekend, consider whether your kids will have a meltdown at party 2 because they’re overstimulated. - Remember the value of sleep.
Skipping sleep {for adults and kids} just makes you tired and grumpy. You’re also more likely to make a mistake or get sick.
One final thought: The holiday season can be an emotional time of year for many reasons. Finances. Relationships. Weather. If you can’t shake the overwhelm, find someone to talk to about it. Often just telling a friend that you feel like a burnt and broken gingerbread cookie {and hearing her say ‘me too’} will be a relief.
Amen, even at my age, I am still learning to not over-schedule and overwhelm myself. I want the best experience for my children and grandchildren when they are home for the holidays and take on too much most years. The best times are spontaneous usually.
So true! There’s really not a stage when you no longer have stress. I’ve spent a lot of time {and I think every parent does this} saying “when my kids are older, I will…” but there is really always something new.